I once read a fascinating interpretation of love, in Gila Manolson’s book, Magic Touch. She explores the phrase, “I love chicken.” To say, “I love chicken” can be logically unpacked as follows:
I love chicken.
(meaning) I love the way chicken tastes.
(meaning) I love the way chicken makes me feel.
(meaning) I love myself.
To truly love chicken would be to ask the chicken if it’s cold, and offer it a little chicken sweater.
This idea, of true love’s absolute selflessness, rivets me. And I realize that everything of substance that I’ve accomplished in my life, in and out of education, happens while I live in that elevated place.
I call it being in a state of love.
Notice how you feel when you see a baby or dog do something cute. You’re not in “I love you” mode, but rather, you’re in “I love everything” mode. In that state of love, you don’t need anything, nor do you have any expectations. You’re just living there. It's what the best teachers and coaches do. And I’ve seen how they lead from that place, and why I try to do the same.
It was the look on the assistant coach’s face, back on the HS football team, when he challenged a senior linebacker to a foot race, to the backdrop of cheering players. State of love: the moment was about pure and connected competition, done collaboratively and not antagonistically.
It was the manner in which my first math department chair repeatedly preached to us that there should be “no surprises” on any tests or quizzes. State of love: she inherently knew the importance of setting the students up for success, and how demoralizing surprises on tests could be.
It’s the way I responded to a student’s “thank you”. She had entered a full class, and from where she stood, no chair was available to her. So I hoisted a chair from across the room, over everyone’s head, and set it down next to her. State of love: I responded with “of course,” communicating: “of course we’re not going to start class until you too have a place to sit.”
Being in a state of love is the preeminent standard to make leadership decisions. Every choice, even purely logistic ones, can be viewed and decided through a loving lens.
This was my message to the teachers of Orange County, Florida. Upon being invited to keynote their back-to-school professional learning day, I asked myself, “What’s one message that I want to communicate to them?” Inevitably, it was a message of my love for them, and for what all teachers do.
In the weeks leading up to that talk, I carried around a mammoth level of love in my heart, just to have enough to unleash that day. And now I share that with you.
Thank you for being on this journey with me.
~ Robert
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